January 2012
This is how old I am
we’re drinking a nice bottle of champagne, waiting to ring in the new year, and all I can think about is the impending heartburn.
“There were only 3 aspirin left, so I made the executive decision to take 2...”
– My wife just laid the COLDEST shit on me.
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People singing Christmas carols on New Years Eve
People singing Christmas carols on New Years Eve
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scottfriday replied to your photo: If we finish this before one of us falls asleep,…
do you keep this in a pretty cab-i-net?
Well played, my friend. Can’t wait until you and the lovely Miss Z live closer.
WatchThis is Kel watching Pitbull.
“I just don’t get this Bulldog guy”
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Watching New Years Rocking Eve makes me want to...
but Kel is making me be festive. We are taking part in one of her favorite pastimes- criticizing the rich and famous.
ATTN: JUSTIN BIEBER IS CURRENTLY PERFORMING "LET...
Update your Bucket Lists accordingly
I'll put money on Beyonce appearing on New Year's...
Christmas haul:
thekelsmith:
themattsmith:
Carhartt jacket, game camera, camo hunting jacket and bibs, hand-me-down .22, Gander Mountain gift card. Am I a stereotype yet?
Christmas haul:
Carhartt jacket, game camera, camo hunting jacket and bibs, hand-me-down .22, Gander Mountain gift card. Am I a stereotype yet?
Either Audrey is overtired from not napping today
or someone slipped her a sizable bump of crystal
“There is a very specific amount of booze, that, if I drink it, I feel so pretty.”
– My lovely wife, just now.
December 2011
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Kel and I have absolutely no clue what we're doing...
which most likely means takeout food and in bed by 11.
Let’s Start Paying College Athletes - NYTimes.com →
A step-by-step proposal for fixing the broken economics of big-time college sports.
If Tumblr incorporated the features of Missing E...
Ask Formspring
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brownhound replied to your post: The truth is that hunters and fisherman put more money towards conserving natural resources than most armchair treehuggers ever will.
Have you read ‘Bloodties’ by Ted Kerasote? I finished it last month and thought it was an interesting exploration of different hunting viewpoints. The author grew up hunting, was a vegetarian for a few years, and then went back to...
The truth is that hunters and fisherman put more...
And I say that with nothing but love for NON-armchair treehuggers.
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lady88 replied to your photo: Kel just sent me this picture. It’s the beginning…
It’s my fault because I JUST asked you about it!!
The FIRST thing I thought was “This is all Mary Ellen’s fault.”
Pro tip: when your nose is stuffed up, Southern...
I’m not blaming S.T., I’m blaming my nose
“Portlandia” is an extended joke about what Freud called the narcissism of small...”
– Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen in “Portlandia” : The New Yorker
You want 10% of the world to love you, not 90% to...
baitandswitch:
— Sam Kinison as quoted by Lisa Lampanelli
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My favorite thing about making ham stock
is picking the chunks of falling-apart ham from the colander full of veggies and herbs and fat and eating them.
Kel just trusts the foam
which is odd, because she doesn’t really trust anything else
I mean, honestly
if the kid is really stuffed up, you have to suck SO HARD, and all I think is “were it not for a small piece of foam, her snot would go right down my throat” and that’s all it takes.
For the record, Kel is totally capable of using...
I secretly think she just makes me do it because she thinks it’s funny
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editude replied to your post: Tonight’s fried rice:
Fish sauce is the most foul smelling stuff. I’ve never used it at home to any advantage. Everything smells like feet.
Keep trying. It’s worth it.
Tonight's fried rice:
smoked ham, chicken, onion, bell pepper, green onions, garlic, ginger, napa cabbage, mung sprouts, eggs, fish sauce, rice wine vinegar and soy sauce
There's a particular combination of sriracha and...
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2012 will be a year of:
family
new experiences
simplicity (to the extent that it is possible)
eating more meat that I killed myself
change
reading by lantern light
a more fully realized orderly chaos
acquiring skills
making sure Kel knows that I love her
making sure Audrey knows that I love her
minor relocation
holding close friends closer
brief excursions of solitude bookended by home
nature
...
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thekelsmith replied to your post: January 1 : Project Positivity
I’ve heard that before…
Just re-focusing, sweetheart
January 1 : Project Positivity
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tracingben replied to your post: You guys should unfollow me.
No way, you’re one of the cool guys.
God save us all if that’s ever the truth.
You guys should unfollow me.
I mean, not YOU, but the rest of you.
I got nothing.: BTW I got a Kindle. →
losingmyhopeinhumanity:
-rosasparks-:
ooodles:
And I love it.
But, if one more person tells me they wouldn’t get one because they ‘like books.’ I’m going to slap them.
I like books. That’s why I got a kindle. I do not have endless amounts of space for print books.
WORD THE FUCK UP.
I had some douchewaffle tell me they…
I love my Kindle. Trying to figure out what I need to do to...
I have very few real "complaints" about my life
it is, more or less, as I designed it. There are things I want and can’t have, and things I have that I don’t need.
But what I’m REALLY jealous of is people that have the time and freedom to wake up, shower, fix and eat breakfast in a sunny window at a leisurely pace before leaving for work.
I want that so much.
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whydoihaveablog replied to your post: Whether or not you deny yourself a damn cookie to make your hip bones stick out more or whatever
Yeah, but I wanna find out how Jesus got his ribs to stick out like that. I want that.
Crucifixion. And Bikram. It’s in the bible.
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mindbabies replied to your post: Whether or not you deny yourself a damn cookie to make your hip bones stick out more or whatever
hm, i am a bit of a foodie. recipes, pictures of my food, and cravings make occasional appearances on my blog…just a heads up!
Hey, I’m with you.
Let’s talk about food, not size.
Motivational platitudes are boring, and when they have to do with size...